How was your summer?

A question that feels too complex to answer.

My summer was great! I....

    - went to a bunch of Nolan's baseball games

    - spent a lot of quality time with lots of different friends

    - celebrated our 19th anniversary, while Nolan was in Washington, D.C.

    - went to Cedar Rapids for Taste of Kodaly

    -started therapy

    -had the trip of a lifetime to Europe with Jason, Nolan and my mom

    -drummed with a Master Drummer for an entire weekend

    -won a (runner-up) Excellence in Education award

    -enjoyed alone time

    -hosted a couple of fun, yummy gatherings

    -went paddle boarding and kayaked

    -turned 42

    -had a lot of great naps

    - enjoyed Adventureland, Board and Brush and a golf outing

    -tried a new workout

    -read/listened to 16 books

    -all of the medical professionals keep telling me I'm young!

    -reflected and remembered what an amazing tribe I have


AND.....My summer kind of sucked!  I...

    -didn't finish the school year

    -recovered from a lumpectomy in both breasts and a sentinel lymph node dissection

    -learned I have a clotting mutation so I can't take the drug most people take after cancer treatment

    -had 20 rounds of radiation

    -dealt with (and am still dealing with) skin/burn issues from radiation.

    - went to 37 doctor appointments

    -had a shot of Lupron in my ass to shut down my ovaries

    - have a consult for a hysterectomy next week


Both can be true.  It was great, and it sucked.  

The only time my cancer diagnosis wasn't top of mind was when we were in Europe.  

I continue to feel so thankful for the timing of all of this, I am thankful I could nap almost every day this summer and give my body time to heal.  I am thankful Nolan is 13 and doesn't need me to entertain him.  We still had plenty of fun, but it was different.

I do LOVE not working, but this basket on my counter full of notes from my family, colleagues, friends, and Brookview family remind me what I have to go back to.  They love me, and I love them, and we will laugh, swear, cry, roll our eyes, feel joy and pride, consume caffeine, and love on other people's mostly amazing children for the next year and beyond.

This year will be different.  I have been changed.  I will never be the same person I was before April 10 (diagnosis day), or May 15 (surgery day) or August 2 (last radiation) or August 9 (first shot of Lupron).  I'm discovering this new and hopefully improved version, and it's going to take some time.  

But really, I love summer!  I wish it weren't over.


 

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